Blew It Again
How do I keep from triggering my spouse’s anger? My spouse suffered a TBI (left frontal/parietal lobe) in February of 2016. If you didn’t know him before, you’d never suspect. Things went well until recently. Now he easily becomes angry with me that I have let him down. For example, yesterday, a friend died. My spouse had been saying how much he hates it that there seems to be so much death in our circle of friends and acquaintances lately. I was away from the house when we received the call; the friend’s husband called to get in touch with my husband — his wife was being disconnected from life support as we spoke, and he wanted to talk with Brad. I was at a church event. As soon as I figured my spouse was off the phone, I called him. We spoke, and I asked him if he was ok. He said he was fine, and so I finished up and came home a couple of hours later. When I arrived, I found he was furious with me because I had not come home right away — I had “chosen myself and the approval of others over him.” I can certainly see it from his point of view. But I can also see that I called to check, and I’m pretty sure I said I could come home right then if he wanted me. I have been trying to pay close attention to his moods and issues. I do well for a while — then I do something stupid like yesterday, and we’re back to square one. Any advice? I feel so guilty.